Little annoyances- What's the big deal?

After pursuing other ventures and leaving University I have had the opportunity to live a different way of life. I experienced living life in way where I wasn't going to get what I wanted or needed when I wanted or needed it. Things were not going to plan, on time or how I expected.

 I have grown up in a society where structure and routine, time and people all play a part in getting what you want, like you expected. What I've learned is that this way of living, day to day has actually damaged the overall quality and happiness which I could have experienced with no effort whatsoever. Instead I consciously seek happiness to distract from the unnecessary stress I may have caused. Now I'm usually described as a laid back person so I try not to over think and get stressed out but I never really understood the benefits as much as I have now.

Right, but where am I going with this? Let me add a bit of perspective to it all...

Let's consider clocking off for the day at 5pm, you get into your car or catch a bus. There's traffic, all you're thinking about is getting home, maybe making yourself dinner, having a hot drink and winding down for the night. All your mind is envisioning is the sofa, your spot you can sink in after a long day. Unfortunately there has been an accident on the way, it doesn't look like you'll be home for a while. You're getting angry. You want to join the other drivers and repeatedly stick your head out of the window trying to see what the hold up is. You give the person in the car next to you a look as to say- yeah buddy we're struggling together. You're both in unison with your annoyance and frustration but why? Fast forward, you get home, you convey your anger for another thirty minutes or so to someone living with you or even to yourself. You have your dinner, your day hasn't gone to plan and you go to bed tired after the events but the lingering feeling of 'what a crappy day' hasn't quite left. WHY? The fact is none of that had to occur. Yes, you would not have been able to change the situation you were in but your attitude and the way you perceived the situation was up to you.

So what was the big deal?

Instead of making a big deal out of the situation and thinking of how it got in your way, maybe the time you spent expending negativity could have been much more positive. Heck, you weren't moving! Use the time to wind down another way, make a phone call (using hands free) to a friend you haven't caught up with in a while, listen to that 90's radio station you're usually embarrassed to listen to, think about other things you want to do other than the one thing you had in your mind. Expand your horizons and make the most of the situation. See the positive side in any circumstance, be hopeful for the person involved in the accident you're complaining about, maybe they won't even get to go home.

It can be applied to many everyday situations we get stressed out about and the fact is it was all avoidable. Take the common example of someone walking slowly in front of you, how many times have you gotten frustrated and rolled your eyes. Quite easily solvable and it wasn't as big a deal as you made out to be with a sigh to indirectly let that person know. How about waiting in a line at the supermarket longer than you expected? So what, being annoyed about it isn't going to make it go any faster.

 At the time our stress levels don't seem that great but collectively the way we behave to these little annoyances will affect us more than we realise. Have you ever taken it out on someone when you didn't mean to? I have and then felt terrible about it afterwards- guess what, it doesn't need to happen.

The point is we are in control of how we feel, we are in control of making the most of what is presented to us. Consideration for that around you and not only your goal plays a huge part. We can choose to have a crappy day because of being annoyed at little things or we can look at them and think- no big deal.

Safi.